So far, by God's grace

Wednesday, July 31, 2013

On Love, Marriage & Fairytale Fantasies

Most Indian girls around my age have had arranged marriages. My parents, grandparents, uncles, aunts and in-laws all had arranged marriages. In my immediate family at least, these have worked and they have been happily married for as long as they have been married. None of them were forced into marriage.

I didn't have an arranged marriage. I "fell" in love with and willfully chose the man I married. My non-Indian friends often ask me if I too had an arranged marriage. When I reply in the negative, the response is usually something like "Phew! Thank God!" I guess their idea of what an arranged marriage is a world apart from what is a reality in my family!

Now, as a teenager, I had wild fantasies of a dashing prince charming sweeping me off my feet. My one true love, that charming young guitar playing, worship leading, bike riding, love poem reciting man who was created for me. Now the man I married can't remember the lyrics to his own favorite song, let alone recite love poems! He does play the guitar and sing,  but not every Sunday in church! And that bike,  it was sold soon after we got married!

Am I happily married? Oh yes I am!  Is my marriage healthier than my parents? I honestly don't know. Do I love him more today than on our engagement day? Heaven yes!!! ( Why do people say Hell yeah! anyway??)  Marriage is choosing daily to love your spouse because Christ loved you first.  Loving Ashwin didn't happen by accident. I chose it, just as I chose to love & follow Christ.

I read this today. And, I had to share it!

My Husband is not my Soulmate.


  1. You seem to be thinking on the same lines as the lady in the posted link...

    1. Yes! That's why it fascinated me. Although, I must admit, I thought the opposite for a long time.