So far, by God's grace

Thursday, March 12, 2009

To all the dolls i've loved before

There's a famous song that goes "To All the Girls I've loved before" I think It's a beautiful song... but here's my version of it, and this is how it goes!

To all the dolls I’ve loved before
To all the dolls I've loved before

Who travelled in and out my door
I'm glad they came along
I dedicate this song
To all the dolls I've loved before
To all the dolls I once caressed
And may I say I've held the best
For helping me to grow
I owe a lot I know
To all the dolls I've loved before

The winds of change are always blowing
And every time I try to stay
The winds of change continue blowing
And they just carry me away

To all the dolls who’ve played with me
Who filled my days with ecstasy
They live within my heart
I'll always be a part
Of all the dolls I've loved before

I'm at my parents home now, waiting away the last few weeks before my precious baby is due. I'm bored most of the day and one of the things that keeps me occupied here is rumage through my childhood stuff to see what I can use for my baby. And that's how this blog post has come about. I don't want to generalise but I think most girls share a special bond with their dolls. My dolls and teddy bear could be anyone I wanted them to be, but mostly they played the roles of children or students.

Suzie was my first doll. I got her as a present when I was just a few weeks old. She used to have beautiful blonde hair until the time I decided she too needed regular shampoo hair washes like my mom gave me! She could close her eyes if I lay her flat and open them when I stood her up. But over the years she has lost that ability and now can shut only one eye automatically! Oh but she had the prettiest blue eyes and was the inspiration behind all the blond haired, blue eyed doodles in my coloring books. Then one day when I was 6, my friend Riya came over to play with her doll. We were playing "princess-princess" and somehow we got it into our heads that if we wanted to turn our dolls into princesses, we had to dot their faces with different colored markers. Me, being the bolder one, volunteered my Suzie for the beauty treatment first. We had just finished one side of her face when my mom walked in on us, whisked Suzie away to dunk her in a bucket of detergent while Riya was sent home with her still beautiful doll. Oh..Suzie also lost both her little fingers somewhere along the way. They were bitten off by yours truly, although the exact circumstances surrounding the amputation remain foggy in my memory!
The next significant one is Nikki. Nikki is my once gorgeous, dark chocolate and custard colored teddy bear. Nikki is a boy bear and was named (dont ask me why) after the naughty, naughty boy Nikki (Nikhil) who shared my desk at pre-school. The real Nikki used to do mean things like stick chewed gum on my chair and hair, sharpen his pencils on both ends so he could poke me while he wrote, and make up silly rhymes about me. I had a complaint about him to carry home every single day and it beats me why I still wanted to name my precious teddy bear after him! I used to dress Nikki up in cloth nappies and my old baby clothes. I even used to feed him milk (my own homemade mixture of flour and water) which he would dutifully drink, unlike Suzie who was a stubborn little doll. Of course the fact that teddy bears are made of absorbant material was completely overlooked! Like Suzie, Nikki also got his share of regular baths and shampoos. Which might explan his current looks.

I had many more... like Patti (literally translated to mean 'dog' in Malayalam) - my white plastic dog on wheels that I loved to bits and would walk around with everywhere until I turned 4 or so. And then there were Lilly 1 and Lilly 2, Monks the monkey, My 2 barbie dolls and some more stuffed toys. But Suzie and Nikki were my all time favorites. Even through my turbulent teens ( and believe me, they were turbulent!) I would sometimes talk to my dolls because I felt they were the only ones who listened without giving advice! Even today, as I look at them, I am reminded of all the innocent fun times Ive had with them and I'm thankful!


  1. you had a doll name suzie??lolllll..that's hilarious!!..have you told my sis?hehe..
    oh and you have gum in ODC???? :-O

  2. U still have ur childhood stuff...girl ur lucky!! Guess am too old to expect all that to survive [:)] The only things I have left are the b & w photos!!!!

  3. LOL: I think I've told her that sometime ago.... and the gum incident was when we were living in Vellore. But, ODC does have chewing gum... just as it does have broadband internet now!!! hah!

    Madhu: I'll tell you why I have my childhood stuff. First, I have no siblings that came along after me to desstroy them and second, as a child I had 3 aims in life: become a teacher, get married, become a mother!!!! So even as a child I used to speak of keepink my stuff safe for my kids!! LOL.... I am a wierd one, I know!

  4. I loved this post, Deeps. Its totally you!!!! Isn't Nikhil the fay chubby boy in one of your old pics, where both of you are around 3-ish? I totally know your daughter is gonna look like tat!! :)

  5. I meant Fat, not fay... actually, i just meant Chubby.. :)

  6. wwaaahh.. i wish i had my childhood toys......!!

  7. You aur so lucky to still have so many of your own toys to show to the little one who is coming. I enjoyed this post so much.

  8. Hey..first time on your blog....must say,u're damn good,nah XCELLENT,ALL IN CAPS!!!And like the others said,u're really lucky to have all u'r childhood stuff